https://pixabay.com/images/id-2425121/

Cynical Dictionary Entry #1

pet

/pet/

noun

  1. An unhealthy coping mechanism for individuals with the inability to form or maintain long term relationships with people.
  2. One of any species, domesticated or otherwise, ripped from the loving care of its mother and sold into bondage, for a profit.
  3. A type of living gargoyle, employed by lonely people to ward off feelings of solitude and existential boredom.

“Of course I have a pet, I’m an unlovable piece of shit”.

--

--

--

🖤 Poet 😎 Demotivational Speaker 🧠 Terrible Advice For Great Results

Love podcasts or audiobooks? Learn on the go with our new app.

Get the Medium app

A button that says 'Download on the App Store', and if clicked it will lead you to the iOS App store
A button that says 'Get it on, Google Play', and if clicked it will lead you to the Google Play store
Eli Brooks

Eli Brooks

🖤 Poet 😎 Demotivational Speaker 🧠 Terrible Advice For Great Results

More from Medium

How do you define a great married life?

Want to Get Better at Saying No? Using This One Statement Can Help

Woman wearing a white top sitting in front of a woman wearing a blue long-sleeved top.

Waking the Little Match Girl

Another one of those nights that I am feeling thankful, sobriety has brought me many great things…